Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Try Before You Buy...

On my ride home from work today I started thinking about all of the things I've bought and have been totally disappointed with. In a stroke of pure genious- I've decided to compile a list of things that I would've been better off trying before buying.

1. Underwear- the obvious. You have to make sure they pass the shift factor. Can't have your delicates up your crack all day.

2. Aerosol cheese- although aerosol cheese sounds like the dreamiest thing in the whole world, it is possible to get a bad batch. It makes perfect sense to try it out first.

3.Shoes- the 3 foot strut in the store with one shoe on and the other dragging along beside you because it's attached with a loop of plastic does not count as trying before you buy. Also, the stupid plastic button they poke thru the shoes so you can't steal them. Quite deceiving. Once you get the darn shoes home you find that wearing them is like walking on small shards of glass. Not cool.

4. Soy Milk- I've never had it, but it stikes me as something you'd have to try out first before spending $4.50 on half a gallon. Anything that's called "Rice Dream" doesn't sound very dreamy!
5 Body Shapers- what kind of shape are you showing off when the stupid thing rolls down into a tire around your waste. Not to mention cutting off all circulation to your legs.

6. Fat Free Milk- as if the grey color wasn't your first indication. Let me tell you- the 1% makes a huge difference.

7. Tofu- to me it takes like a kitchen sponge. Waste of money.

8. Eggbeaters- yeah there healthier then regular eggs, but you have basically handed over your money for a cardboard container of yellow snot. No thanks.

9. Hotdogs- no two hotdogs are alike. Some are juicy and some aren't. And some even have those hard white chunks of stuff that always get your gag reflex going. Also, note to all those weekend warriors. The ones that do all of their errands in a marathon session. Ummm- the hotdog stand in the Home Depot- NEVER GOOD!! Steer clear of any snack shops that pop up in BJ's, Target, Walmart, etc. - not only are you asking for trouble- you also look like a total fatty!

10. Chili in a jar- no explanation needed!

Feel free to email me your suggestions for "Try Before You Buy". I'll post the best ones tomorrow. Click the envelope at the end of this posting to send me an email.



Meredith said...


Meredith said...

test 2

Anonymous said...

I totally agree, especially with the underwear and shoe part. But then, trying on them panties in a Wal Mart aisle and then hanging them back on the rack may cause for some turning heads....or a talk with the store manager....and worst of all, the surveillance camera tapes will probably end up on youtube and your reputation will be forever ruined...;)

bajacob said...

A)Fat Free milk is an acquired taste...right Diane? Although, some of us now need to drink Lactaid… (Ok so the cat's out of the bag. Yes, I have become lactose just wait, you're turn will come!)

B)What's wrong with egg beaters? Could it be you're having cooking issues...hmmm...

C)Hot dogs with white're scaring me! Stop buying them at the Dollar store! Rich & I discussed this & we decided that you need to splurge a little & go for a better brand of dog such as Dietz & Watson, Nathan's, Hebrew National, or Oscar Mayer. Let me know how that works out for you.